23 years...

I miss my mommy soo much today. I'm a mom now; it is just surreal that it's only been 23 years since she gave birth to me.
I'm sure I was the light of her life at the time. I was to her, what Annabelle is to me. 


Just thinking about my past, present, and future a lot today. 


Today was a beautiful day. Filled with love and laughter. Good friends...and a wonderful family, that I've created.
And I'm so sad she's not here to celebrate this day..or any days in the future with me. .
I feel like your birthday is just as much your mothers day to reminisce on your life, as it is yours..kwim?  


She passed away 9 days after my 14th birthday. 


She threw a surprise birthday party for me..she filled my day with love and laughter. She wanted to know that I was soo loved. And then she left me.


I wish I never had to leave Annabelle. Ever. I don't ever want to leave her feeling this way...
but it's inevitable, right? When you've loved and lost..time and time again. You know.
I know that this loss makes me a better person. I know that losing my mother, I will be a better mother.
I will love, with all my heart, all of you.
Goodnight.